Look, Ma, two crutches!

The distance from the couch to the bathroom is, by a generous estimate, 20 feet. The fact that I just walked -- with real, weight-bearing steps! -- that 20 foot distance is the best thing that's happened to me today, and I say that even on a day where I spent the entire day reading, doing the crossword and watching old episodes of "Chuck."

It's been nine days since the good doctors at New York Presbyterian cut open my knee, cleaned up the cartilage that was apparently hanging around and then cut and resewed some tendons to (hopefully) permanently relocate my kneecap back to where it belongs. After two days of rarely mitigated post-surgical agony, the road back has been encouraging, I think -- first it was getting rid of the Percocet-induced rash, then getting to and from the bathroom without help, getting on and off the couch without help, standing up long enough to dry my hair with intent, moving back to sleeping in my bed and now taking actual, foot-goes-up-and-down steps. Unfortunately for me, I had envisioned a timeline for these events that took Friday through Tuesday, not Friday through the Sunday following. I also, somehow, expected recovery to be completely pain free. So that was a fun surprise.

Anyhow, the downsides of being kind of unwashed, unable to do simple household tasks like make a cup of tea or put on my own socks and waking up every 4 or 5 hours because my body desperately wants to turn over on its side are what they are. The upsides, however, are that once the painkillers take effect, you have a lot of time to do super-mellow, couch-based activities and absolutely no reason not to do them.

To wit, I have watched "Baby Mama," a selection of greatest-hits of Julia Child on "The French Chef," all of the first season of "How I Met Your Mother," the complete existent episodes of "Chuck," read "The Invention of Hugo Cabret," made good progress on "The Hobbit," reread "The Second Rumpole Omnibus" and done a mess of crosswords. I have also napped lavishly, both from inclination and because the vikes make me sleepy.

So that's been actually pretty great, and when I can actually walk enough to leave the confines of my apartment and act like a grownup again, I will miss it. A little.